Take a break -- KIT KAT

For a reason KIT KAT keep appearing in my mind. I need a BREAK.... and I have no idea when is the time I wanna get up again to fight in the battle of relationship. Tired of pushing myself to strive for the choice I'd made as in most of the time I keep on telling myself he was the choice I made and I must must must must stick to it and spend all of my effort to make it works.

All sorts of philosophy from friends, christian, and even what I used to insist have no effect on my heart anymore. Many say we should not stick to our feeling only and believe what has been long time being with us is the most precious. Yes, I did believe and had enough in believing. How good was it? The minute I refer my diary, the more solid answer I had in my heart that I was, I am and I would not be happy being with him.

I admit that people do change now and then, just like how I feel about myself. Perfectionist who want to achieve at 100 marks, which is the same being his girl. Bear all the responsibility and role that a girl friend shuold and shouldnt do and I thought I'm proud of myself being a GOOd girl firend. Sarcastically, I never been the ONE in his heart. Facing him I'm totally no confidence and I cant even pick it up from the ground looking at it. I hate to being a brainless person with very less value in his heart. And now you say I'm very important to you when I wan to walk away?

I couldnt think of where to find the energy again to built the our castle... I shall leave it undone. I surrender, I give up!

I just want to be a happy girl without any attachment, any insulting words.

I do, yes, I do have a choice.